As many of my post ideas begin, I was recently clicking around an online cycling forum and stumbled across a discussion that struck me as interesting. A simple question of “will I get made fun of for wearing a pro jersey on my ride” sparked a huge debate about the legitimacy of purchasing and wearing pro team gear. There's a lot of worry about becoming a cycling fred, showing up with gear that your legs can't back up, apparently…
Of course, there were as many opinions as there were posters, ranging from “whatever makes you happy” to “some deity will kill kittens if you wear that Sky jersey on a ride.” With such a wide range of opinions, it's not easy to sort it all out, but I'll do my best for you.
Click through after the jump to figure out how to avoid becoming “that guy.”
Fred? Who's Fred?
The term “cycling fred”, “fred” or “poser” is often bandied about when describing cyclists caught riding with expensive bikes and clothing that far exceeds their capabilities as a cyclist. Bicyclesource.com, in their cycling terminology glossary, defines a cycling fred as “a person who spends a lot of money on his/her bike and clothing, but still can't ride. Synonym for poser.” The argument has been made in many circles that you shouldn't wear the jersey if you've not won the race, should not wear the jersey if you're not on the team, shouldn't ride the bike if you don't have the legs to back it up, etc etc.
In some cases, these definitions may be all too true (think the guy who went out and bought a Madone in Discovery colors, a full Tour de France yellow Discovery kit and rides down the local multi-use trail at 5 MPH once a month) but in many cases, I contend that such anger is misplaced. There are a few times, however that being a fred is just plain fun, and a few times it's outright rude or inexcusable.
The “fred” situation
Pulp Fiction introduced us to “The Bonnie Situation” which, in short refers to a condition in which you find yourself engaging in something that could spell disaster should a third party actually witness you doing it. In a way, this is much like a 15-year-old surfing unscrupulous internet material and hoping his mother doesn't wander in to put away the laundry, but the same treatment can be applied to engaging in “fred” type behavior.
Depending on the rider, how closely they stick to tradition or even how daring a personality they are, you'll hear many different arguments both for and against the use of different pieces of kit. Velominati, in particular, has several thoughts on this. “Wear what you want” is a common theme, involving supporting your favorite team, matching your kit to your bike or simply liking the design of a particular bit of kit you may have in your closet. Similarly, there are definitely folks on the other side of the fence saying “don't wear it if you didn't win it” for national or world champion jerseys, or “if you're not on the team, don't wear it” with respect to pro team wear. And since there are valid arguments on both sides of the fence, it falls to you to exercise some caution and
Similarly, there are definitely folks on the other side of the fence saying “don't wear it if you didn't win it” for national or world champion jerseys, or “if you're not on the team, don't wear it” with respect to pro team wear. And since there are valid arguments on both sides of the fence, it falls to you to exercise some caution and judgment while choosing your kit for the day. The degree to which you go to avoid any potential cycling fred situation is only as deep as your own care for others' opinions of you.
I typically only consider the “Fred Situation” each time I sort through my substantial closet, attempting to choose my kit for an impending ride. These days, it's not so hard: I generally either ride in our current team strip, a Vie13 house kit or one of our old team kits. In the past, there were significant times when I could consider joining the ranks of the cycling freds. Actually, pawing through my closet today reminds me that I still have a large potential to fred at any given time: there's the Irish, Luxembourg, Swiss, Belgian and British national champion jerseys, the Kelly Benefit jersey, Garmin and Radioshack jerseys, Colavita, Kenda, and other continental team jerseys, and of course, the local shop kits all hanging side by side. But even with all these potential train wrecks looming close at hand, applying a little common sense and humility can prevent any snickers, smirks or outright ridicule on your next ride.
How to avoid being a cycling fred
To prevent yourself from unknowingly jumping into a “Fred Situation” ask yourself the following: WHO (am I riding with,) WHAT (kind of ride am I doing,) and WHY (am I going on this ride.)
What kind of ride you're embarking upon is the single most important thing to consider. Group rides can be dangerous places to bring out your fancy kit: the potential to step on someone's toes is higher, especially if it's a training ride of some kind. It would be embarrassing to show up in a US national champion kit, only to have a US National Champion on the ride with you. But knowing the group well can afford you the ability to show up in said US Champions kit and get a compliment or two, or a good natured ribbing, depending on your group. There are some places where strict rules must be followed, however; do not EVER show up at a sanctioned race in anything other than team kit or plain kit. Not only is it poor etiquette to show up at a race sporting a national or world champion jersey, it is often illegal and could get you DQed from the race. If you didn't win it, don't wear it. A lot of blood, sweat and tears went into winning that jersey, and buying it off Amazon doesn't give you the right to wear it in competition. Common sense here folks. If you think it might cause a problem, best not to wear it.
Who you are riding with is probably the second most important thing to ask yourself. Are you riding alone? With a group? Choose your attire based upon who's going to be riding with you. If you're out for a hammerfest with your teammates, don't be a goof and wear the US champion's jersey. Not only will you look a little out of place, but your teammates will probably find it necessary to attack you unmercifully and drop you like a stone. In theory, you SHOULD be wearing your team kit anyway, but that's just my thought. Should you be out riding with your casual Sunday group or alone, you're in the perfect place to fly whatever freak flag you wish. Feel like sporting Fabian's Swiss cross on your solo ride through the muddy backroads? Go for it…the only people who will care will be the cars who pass you too closely.
Why you're riding is a very ethereal kind of question. It intertwines itself into the previously mentioned questions and can almost be inseparable from them. Generally, WHY is a great way of qualifying your answers from the previous two questions you've asked yourself. But sometimes, there are days which you just decide you need to get out of the house and hit the road; maybe to destress, to think, or just clear your head. When you've got no objective, or your only objective is to be solitary and impress nobody but yourself, pull on whatever you like and zip it up. Nothing can lift spirits (or make you feel like your cycling heros or cycling heroines) like riding in your favorite piece of kit.
Accepting your inner cycling fred
Nobody is perfect, and everybody likes to have a little fun. Occasionally, you'll commit a fashion faux-pax and you'll show up wearing the wrong thing. It's ok though (as long as it's not a race.) The more comfortable with your own inner cycling fred, the more congenial everyone else will be with it as well. Laugh about it. “I went dumpster diving at Boonen's chateau and swiped his old cocaine smeared jersey” could be the perfect retort to a snide “when did you win THAT?” Remember, it's not like there aren't thousands of football fans out there wearing Tom Brady jerseys, right? You're not all that different from those football guys, except that most of them weigh about 300 pounds and make the sofa their permanent home. But I digress…
Except in the few cases where rules must be followed (i.e. racing) you shouldn't be afraid to wear what you wish. I mean, really, when was the last time one of the riders in the group stopped you, pulled out his best Samuel L. Jackson voice and laid this upon you:
You got to appreciate what an explosive element this Fred situation is. If he comes home from a hard day's training and finds a bunch of amateur cyclists doin' a bunch of amateur cyclist shit on his tarmac, ain't no tellin' what he's apt to do.
